4:30 am, Saturday morning. Quiet. Dark. Can’t sleep. I rolled over and nuzzled my forehead into the open space between Warwick’s neck and shoulder. Perfect fit. Just like a puzzle.
I closed my eyes, once again, and waited for the stillness in my mind to return. But, instead I heard the wind whipping against the window pane, and some crazy a** bird singing a lullaby. I flipped over, scooting my tail into Warwick’s side, and fluffed my pillow as I placed it against my cheek.
“Go to sleep.” I thought. “Go to sleep. Go to sleep.” Silence. Nothing.
I rolled myself out of bed, and stumbled into the office. The desk chair groaned and creaked as I pulled out the keyboard and logged onto the computer. The light from the screen shone into my face, and my fingers instinctively wandered off and began tapping on the keys.
The sound of the tapping was hypnotic. The haze of blues and grays that filtered into the house was calming, heavenly.
So I sat, and I dreamed of the day ahead and the perfection that it could hold. I love this time of day, when I’m always optimistic, and I’m my true self.
And then, the blackness came. As quickly as the calm had risen, it ran away fleeing from me, back into the forbidden lair from which it had come.
“Moooommmmmmeeeeeee, Bella said I can’t . . . . .”
Seriously. Are you serious? It is only 6:00 am, I’m not ready. . . I’m not ready . . . I’m not ready.”
I wanted to retreat; the battle had not yet began, and already I was heading for the hills. And I did. I retreated into my selfish hole that I sometimes crawl into, my bunker that’s only big enough for me. I came out often enough to yell “Be nice to your sister! Stop being so ungrateful!” and the ever threatening “BECAUSE I SAID SO!”. I performed only the duties that I was obligated to, and allowed the rest to fall by the wayside.
After lunch, we headed to my eldest daughter’s basketball game. I sat in the car as long as I could, and only went into the gym when I knew the game was about to start.
As I sat in my chair, my sweet little Soledad climbed into my bunker and onto my lap. She nuzzled her cute little head into the empty space between my neck and my shoulder. Perfect fit. Just like a puzzle.
In the background, I could hear the rumble of thunder as it tried to make an entrance. There was a loud CRACK!, a flash of lightening, and then the lights went out. The lights flickered on, once or twice, and then turned back on again. It all happened so quick. I don’t think anyone else noticed.
I shook my head to get my bearings, and as I did, I looked down at Soledad. The blackness had faded away, and in it’s place, perfection. Maybe this was a perfect day. I was surrounded by all five of my puzzle pieces, and my puzzle was complete. There was nothing more that I needed. So, I decided to stop, and just be grateful.
I think tonight we’ll have a little movie night, in quiet celebration of one another. We’ll watch a little Harry Potter, and Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs. We’ll be thankful for the family that is our own, and maybe even have a little popcorn.
Movie Night Popcorn
” This is a humble little concoction that we make on special movie nights. We use leftover Trick or Treat candy that has been put away and reserved for later use.”