This is what I love and hate about my husband.
He tells the truth NO MATTER WHAT THE COST.
“How do I look in this?” I say.
“Like somebody getting ready to go to a Disco Party and afterwards will stop to hug a tree.” he might say.
Point taken. I change clothes.
But. .. I’m pissed.
“How does the Chili taste?” I say. “I haven’t tried it. Is it too salty?” I ask.
“Is it ever too salty? That is what you always ask? You never taste it. Don’t you think you should taste it???” He VERY RUDELY replies.
I blow hot nasty air in his direction and curse under my breadth.
“Look! I made you this yummy scrumptious smoothie!!! I know how much you like the Pumpkin Smash at Jamba Juice, so I thought I’d try my hand at it. It’s really good, try it!”
He tries, and smiles. “Mmm. Good. But. . .It has a little something funny I’m tasting. No thanks, I’ll pass.”
“WHAAATTTT???? You’ll pass? I MADE THIS FOR YOU. You can’t pass. That is very rude.”
“Well, I don’t like it that much. I don’t want it. Thank you for making it for me. But no thank you.”
Uffff. He’s horrible.
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So let me just say this.
HIS OATMEAL SUCKS.
AND. . .he makes it from a package, so that’s like triple worse. Because how on earth can someone make oatmeal taste bad when it has all the flavor and seasonings in the package???? Answer that, Mr. Critical!!!
And another thing.
I REMEMBER ALL THOSE TIMES, I TOLD YOU I WAS FAT.
And you said “NO, YOU’RE NOT. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL. I LOVE YOU. I THINK YOU ARE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL WOMAN IN THE WORLD. AND EVEN IF YOU WERE FAT, I WOULDN’T CARE. BECAUSE LIKE I SAID, ‘YOU ARE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL WOMAN IN THE WORLD!!!!”
So. . .
I guess you get a pass on this Pumpkin Smoothie Thing. Because I’d rather be beautiful than the best pumpkin smoothie maker in the world.
So, just be warned Mr. Woo, these beautiful eyes are watching your very rude and obnoxious self.
And. . . .
I’m taking all the pumpkin smoothie with me while I strut my beautiful self to the smoothie hall of fame!
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So who cares that this smoothie is not his cup of tea.
He claims he doesn’t like onions either.
Or GARLIC.
And this is killer.
He won’t eat butter and jelly on his dinner rolls.
*gasp* I know. Sometimes I really wonder about him.
But don’t you worry. Just go on ahead and make this smoothie, and you’ll love it.
And then you’ll see what I’m dealing with.
Purely Pumpkin Smoothie!
Makes about 2 LARGE Servings
Ingredients:
1/2 cup Pureed Pumpkin
3-4 TB Granulated Sugar
1 TB Honey
1/4 teaspoon Cinnamon
1/8 teaspoon Nutmeg
1/8 teaspoon Ground Ginger
1 1/2 cups Ice
1 1/2 cups Vanilla Yogurt
8 oz. Almond/Coconut Milk (or your favorite)
Directions:
1.) In a small bowl, add pumpkin, sugar, honey, cinnamon, nutmeg and ginger. Mix well. Set aside.
2.) Into the blender place, ice, yogurt, and milk. Add the pumpkin mixture. Blend on high. Pour into a tall cold glass. Serve.
*If you’d like an EVEN frostier drink, try using Frozen Yogurt, freezing your milk into cubes, or freezing the pumpkin mixture.
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You know what I love about your posts? That I can hear you saying them in your own voice! They are so you! I love it. And I love Mr. Woo even though I don’t know him. He should give your pumpkin smoothie another shot, tell him I said so. He listens to me.
You ALWAYS make me smile. Thank you for that. And I told him. And he did. And he still didn’t like it!!!