It’s early. Very early. The sun hasn’t even come out. I can hear a few birds chirping, but I think they are just yelling at me to go back to sleep. I’m up, because I’m an “early bird”. It’s when I get the majority of my chores done. I roam around the house cleaning up, writing, and getting ready for the day ahead.
Though I’ve been up for slightly over an hour, I’m still in a haze. I groggily walk around the house, completely grumpy. I can see the light turn on through the crack under my bedroom door. I hear the bed creek, the shower turns on, and then I hear. . . .a loud singing yodel type sound. . . completely off key.
It’s Warwick. He sings in the shower. Every morning. All the time. Always off note. Never on key. One octave higher than Mariah Carey.
I roll my eyes. On some days this trait is completely endearing. Today, it is not. It is loud. And there are sleeping babies to be worried about. I hear the voice in my head telling me to “Shut Up, and stop being so grumpy. Singing is life, and love, and happiness.” So I listen, and move on.
I walk my tired hiney upstairs, mumbling under my breath. Little ones are already awake getting ready for school. I walk into the game room to fold laundry, and I hear the 4 year “beat boxing” in the bathroom with a mouth full of toothpaste foam. She’s loud. Really loud. And off key. And annoying. I want to say something, but I don’t because I think maybe beat boxing is a cousin to singing which is life, and love, and happiness. So I bite my lip, and move on.
I walk into the 6 year old’s room, only to find her dancing AND singing in her underwear. While, NOT getting dressed. I yell at her to get dressed, and stop playing around, but she just ignores me because I’m grumpy. She is too loud. Off key, and completely annoying. But I move on noting a strange trend.
I begin to make my way back down the stairs to the kitchen, when I hear this loud screeching noise. “Is the tea pot exploding?” I wonder. “Do we even have a tea pot?” So I peep through the stair banisters on my way down to the kitchen, and realize it’s just my oldest singing to her Ipod. She’s really loud. And off key. And really annoying. I shouldn’t tell her to stop. But it hurts my ears. But, I don’t because I remember, singing is life, and love and happiness. Blah. Blah. Blah.
Shockingly, with all this racket going on, I hear crying in the distance. The Woo Choir has woken up the baby. Great.
Again my tired hiney takes to the stairs to go retrieve my sleepy, groggy, baby. I open the door to her room, and I’m totally stunned when I realize she is not crying she is humming. Loud and clear. Singing a tune akin to her sister downstairs, the other one in her room, the rapper in the bathroom, and that nut who started it all in the shower.
I live in a house of singing banshees.
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What is the definition of corny anyway?
corny [ˈkɔːnɪ]
adj cornier, corniest Slang
1. trite or banal
2. sentimental or mawkish
3. abounding in corn
Yup. That’s the Woo Clan. Trite, banal, sentimental or mawkish – take your pick. Funny they didn’t have their picture noted as exhibit A.
I too, can serve up my portion of corn. That would be #3, abounding in corn.
Corn Chowder that is.
Corn Chowder that is so good, that I brought my baby TO THE GROCERY STORE, in her pajamas without combing her hair, just so I could get the ingredients.
That’s dedication. Not to my child. To the food. No worries. The baby understands.
Corn Chowder
Ingredients:
2 tablespoons unsalted butter
1 TB oil
1 medium onion, chopped
2 garlic cloves, diced
1/2 tsp Herbes de Provence (or you could use thyme if you don’t have Herbes de Provence lying around)
1/4 cup flour
8 cups chicken stock ( or the equivalent in water and chicken bouillon)
1 pound white potatoes, peeled and cut into bite size pieces
1 cup half and half
1 cup whole milk
6 ears of fresh corn (or 3 cups frozen corn kernels)
Salt and Pepper
Shredded Cheese
Crumbled bacon or ham
Directions:
1. In a large pot, heat butter and oil over medium high heat. Add onion and cook until tender and translucent about five minutes. Add garlic and Herbes de Provence. Cook for one minute longer. Add flour, and stir continually while cooking for 2 minutes longer.
2. Using a whisk to stir, pour in chicken stock, continuing to whisk to incorporate fully.
3. Add the potatoes. Bring the mixture to a boil. Stir in half and half, and reduce the heat to a simmer. Cook uncovered until potatoes are tender about 20 minutes.
3. Add corn, and cook until soft about 15 minutes longer. During the last five minutes of cooking add the milk, and season with salt and pepper. Garnish with cheese and bacon. Serve warm.